41 Sleeps...

It has officially been 41 sleeps since we packed up our life and headed north to Minnesota.  

41 sleeps since I hugged the necks of our Arkansas family.

41 sleeps in multiple beds as we traveled around for Maggie's surgery, house walk through, a Florida vacation, and our first month's worth in Plymouth, MN.

41 sleeps that were sometimes shorter, sometimes longer, sometimes restless, sometimes peaceful, and sometimes left questioning the journey....

First of all- Minnesota, people, is INCREDIBLE!  From the first moment weeks ago when we flew in to find a home, I was left in awe.  So many trees.  So many lakes.  So much wildlife.  And this flooring bush that I seriously cannot get enough of... I mean it smells FANTASTIC {more on that later- ha}.  So many beautiful parks.  So much amazing shopping and fantastic eating.  And the Targets- I mean- wow... these suckers are the epitome of a momma's grocery dream- ha.  I am enjoying it ALL.  I am enjoying finding new treasures to enjoy with the kids.  Enjoying decorating a new house and meeting new friends.  

It is just change.  Oh man, just typing that word makes my skin crawl.  I suck at it and I don't say suck.  I like my routine.  I like my planner.  I like doing a grocery trip in 20 min flat because I could basically shop blindfolded and know where everything is.  I like KNOWING.  Knowing how to get everywhere.  Anticipating what will happen in a day and feeling comfortable in my own skin around the people who know my weirdness, accept my kids for theirs, and are fine with the utter chaos that is the Lee clan.  I LOVED my life in Arkansas.  It wasn't perfect.  No where even CLOSE, but it was comfortable.  It was peaceful.  It was a life Pete and I had worked 5 years at.  It may have been the hardest 5 years of our entire life, but gosh darn-it... that's what made it so darn hard to leave.  The good, the bad, and the seriously ugly happened there.  But you know- it's what makes life beautiful.  The very best things in life, whether I knew it at the time or not, came with a whole ton of work, tears, and some uncertainty, but THEY were the best: beginning our family, finding our dream home, deciding to go down to one income to continue to expand our family, struggling through losing two children and helping one through a disability, job changes, learning we were expecting another miracle of a child, finding a new dream home to house all the rugrats, and reaching outside our comfort zone and putting ourselves out there to find friends... I mean the list goes on and on.  We worked for it.  We prayed over it.  We fought.  And Pete and I held hands through it all... 

Saying good bye to a place where so many firsts happened was tough.  No lie, I cried many a time just thinking of doing life outside my comfort zone with some of the most incredible people I'd ever met.  It's just hard.  As I get older, change doesn't get easier; saying good bye to friends and a home you'd never thought you'd leave- tough.

The thing about change is, I feel its necessary.  As much as I went kicking and screaming when Pete mentioned the move to Arkansas for work, I went.  I sucked it up, put on my big girl pants (over my growing pregnant belly- ha;)) and I went.  I went hand in hand with my man and trusted that this was our plan.  And it was.  It was 100 times over.  It just took time to see it.

I feel the same way now.  I was a little in shock when the move to Minnesota was finalized.  My head swirly with the thought of acclimating not only myself, but 3 young children to a new city sounded daunting.  I struggled at first, but 41 sleeps in, it gets easier every day.  I still struggle.  I'm still very Arkansas homesick, but I pray.  I pray everyday for us to settle in and find our new place in this great area.  The friends we have made so far- incredible.  The guidance from the community to help us form our new routine- perfect.  We are all adjusting, the kids are finding their groove- and so are Pete and I, but we're doing it.  Getting through the uncertainty together.  It may not be unicorns and rainbows around here every day, but we leave the house every day- we are dressed- and we are working for our new normal.  We are working together and that counts.

So here we are.... 41 sleeps in.  All 5 of us holding hands.  It may sound cliche, but this is my pep talk: we got this.  Every day we work a little more at putting those pieces together, google maps in hand, and finding our new normal.  The Lees are here, Minnesota;)....  now to show all this in pictures!  41 days of memories here we come;).